How to Resolve My Hatred to Unfaithful Father

By Li Fan

People often say, “Things turn into their opposites when they reach the extreme.” Deep love can turn into hatred, and the stronger the love, the more intense is its obverse—hatred. Only those who have experienced the pain can truly have such feeling. And Xiao Yun is the one who has suffered such extreme pain.

When Xiao Yun was 9 years old, her father brought a pretty auntie home. Xiao Yun liked her because she was beautiful. But later, Xiao Yun found that the sweet smile on her mother’s face disappeared since the auntie came. Several years later, two younger sisters joined her family. They called her father dad and called the auntie mom. What’s more, with the growth of the younger sisters, obviously her father loved her less and sometimes scolded her for the younger sisters. Xiao Yun just didn’t understand why her father, who once loved her so much, treated her that way for the “outsiders.” Xiao Yun felt extremely aggrieved. She cried out to her mother, hoping her mother, who was fond of her, could do her justice. However, her mother told her a fact that she just could not accept. Her father has an affair, and the two sisters are the daughters of her father and the auntie as well as her half-sisters. “How does such an event shown on TV truly occur in my life?” Xiao Yun wondered.

Gradually, Xiao Yun found that her status in her father’s heart became lower and lower because of the two sisters. Her father began to spend most of his time accompanying the auntie and their daughters and seldom came back home. Even if he occasionally came back home, he and her mother would come to blows, and sometimes they even confronted with each other with a knife or a stool in their hands. Xiao Yun often feared that the knife would fall. Her parents’ quarrel often roused her and her brother at midnight. Her parents loved each other before, but because of the auntie, they often quarreled, and her happy family was broken …

Especially, her father’s favoritism toward the younger sisters made Xiao Yun jealous. “My father’s love belongs to me, but now it is taken away by the two little guys.” The more Xiao Yun thought, the angrier she was. She hated them from the bottom of her heart, because they had stolen her happy family.

Once, Xiao Yun inadvertently heard the auntie asking her father to transfer the house property into her name. Xiao Yun realized that the woman not only had ruined their life, but also wanted to take away everything of them. In this matter her mother was the direct victim. She once found a bottle of liquid medicine in her mother’s room. Xiao Yun knew that because of the auntie’s appearing and her father’s heartlessness, her mother had the thought of world-weariness and that if it were not because her mother couldn’t let go of her and her younger brother, her mother would have already drunk the liquid medicine. Xiao Yun thought: Now mom is depressed, so it is impossible for her to protect the property. I must stand up and protect our interests from harm.

When the auntie came again, Xiao Yun said to her, “Since you don’t respect us, then you don’t expect to get our respect.” From that day on, Xiao Yun often thought of how to transfer the house into the names of her brother and her. She, at such a young age, began to watch law programs and read many law books, learning how the adults protected their own interests with the law. Xiao Yun thought that only the law was her best weapon. If one day the auntie and her father forced them to the end, she would surely resist by legal means.

Xiao Yun, a teenage girl, was laden with anxiety all day long and became more and more experienced. Her peers still lived in their parents’ indulgence, while she lived in fear and anxiety. When Xiao Yun didn’t see her mother after getting home from school, she would hurry to see whether the bottle of liquid medicine was still there, for she thought that her mother would have died if it was not there. The fear that followed her every day made her have an implacable hatred of her father and the auntie. If it were not for them, her family would not have become like this; if it were not for them, she would not have been full of hatred at a very young age. Hatred causes oneself grief and pain, and the pain of hating one’s father who once loved him is even greater. Only those who have experienced it can have a deep feeling about this kind of inner torment.

Xiao Yun learned the legal knowledge as always. She still constantly thought of how to drive the auntie away by legal means and how to transfer her father’s house and car into the names of her brother and her. And son, she lived in anguish, filled with bitter hatred for them.

In the winter of 2009, an auntie she had never met before came to her house. Xiao Yun found that there was a long-lost smile appearing on her mother’s face after the auntie had a talk with her. Xiao Yun hadn’t seen her mother smiling so happily like that for several years, so she liked the auntie from the bottom of her heart. After that, some uncles and aunties often came to her house to have meetings. Seeing that her mother’s mood got better and better after having meetings with them, Xiao Yun began to be curious: What did they say to my mom? How did they help my mom walk out from the pain so easily? Xiao Yun saw clearly that though her mother did not completely put aside the hatred of her father and the auntie, the knot in her heart seemed to be untied and she no longer lived in pain.

When the uncles and aunties came to have a meeting again, her mother asked her and her brother to join them. Xiao Yun heard them read God’s words: “Since the creation of the world I have begun to predestine and select this group of people, namely, you today. Your temperament, caliber, appearance, stature, family in which you were born, your job and your marriage, the entirety of you, even the color of your hair and your skin, and the time of your birth were all arranged by My hands. Even the things you do and the people you meet every single day are arranged by My hands, not to mention the fact that bringing you into My presence today is actually My arrangement. Do not throw yourself into disorder; you should proceed calmly.

Xiao Yun had never heard these words before, but when hearing them she felt so warm and felt familiar with them. These words were like a mother using her hands to touch her sore spot and softly telling her: The family in which you were born has been predestined by God long before. God knows everything you encounter. Don’t feel sorrowful and painful. God is your reliance! Before, Xiao Yun often thought: Why was I born in such a family? Why did such a misfortune occur in my family? Even herding cattle in a poor and rural area would be better than living such a life in such an environment. The hatred tormented Xiao Yun to be in constant suffering. She always wanted to grow up quickly. She thought only when she grew up could she retaliate against them; only when she grew up could she protect her mother; and only when she grew up could she be free from all these things. But after she heard the words of God, under the guidance of God, Xiao Yun suddenly realized: What if I succeed in retaliating against them? Will I really be happy? I have already been hurt and it is difficult to heal my wounds. Isn’t this all fact?

Xiao Yun began to put down the law books and pick up the book of God’s word. With a great hunger and thirst, she read piece after piece: “God Is the Source of Man’s Life,” “God Presides Over the Fate of All Mankind,” “You Should Know How the Whole of Humanity Has Developed to the Present Day,” and so on. The piece after piece of God’s words delivered to Xiao Yun the truth she had never heard before. These words not only consoled her sorrowful heart but also made her see the origin of mankind’s corruption and understand that all the pain was brought to mankind by Satan. Xiao Yun came to know that the emotional entanglement among her father, her mother, and the auntie is the result of their being afflicted by Satan. Because they have no truth, they cannot free themselves from the entanglement but only be tormented by Satan, suffering unspeakable pain with no strength to fight. And she herself is also deeply afflicted by Satan. In order to retaliate against her father and the auntie and protect her mother, she acted according to the satanic poison “It’s never too late to take one’s revenge” and plotted to retaliate against her father and the auntie all day long, living in hatred at a young age. Xiao Yun saw God’s words saying, “Cruel, brutal mankind! The conniving and intrigue, the jostling with each other, the scramble for reputation and fortune, the mutual slaughter—when will it ever end?” God’s words expose and analyze the ugliness that mankind expresses after they were corrupted by Satan. For their own sake, people can fall into enemies. Even the love between a husband and wife or a father and daughter is too fragile to stand any kind of test. Pondering God’s words, Xiao Yun found that all of them, her parents, the auntie, and her, were victims of Satan’s torment. She thought: In the past my mom and I did not understand the truth and lived in hatred. Now, God’s salvation comes upon us. We should believe in God’s word, live in accordance with God’s word, and no longer live in the torment of Satan. When Xiao Yun told her thoughts to her mother, her mother cried. She knew that it was God who saved her and her daughter.

When the auntie and her father came again, Xiao Yun could face them calmly by relying on God. What’s more, her mother asked the brothers and sisters to preach the gospel to them. They both were unwilling to accept. But when her father saw that Xiao Yun and her mother actually put aside the hatred of him and even accepted him and the auntie after they believed in God, he admitted that the One they believed in was the true God and supported them.

Gradually, Xiao Yun grew up. As she read more of God’s word, she saw clearly: In present-day society, keeping mistresses has become a social phenomenon. The appearing of the mistress has caused so many harmonious families to be broken or ruined. Not only do the adults get hurt, but the children also suffer unrelieved misery in their hearts. In fact, be it the one who has an affair or the victim, they all live in the torment of Satan. Although they have suffered so much, they are powerless to extricate themselves. It must be said that Satan has really put a certain amount of effort into afflicting people. If it were not for God’s salvation, Xiao Yun and her mother would live in pain and torment all their life, just like many other victims. Thinking back to the past, Xiao Yun felt that God’s love for her and her mother was really so great.

Under God’s leading, Xiao Yun finally put aside the hatred of her father and the auntie and was freed from the pain. Gradually, her two younger sisters grew up. They considerately helped her mother with the housework, and the elder one of them also had meetings with the brothers and sisters and read God’s word every day. Through her experience, Xiao Yun saw that she could not escape the fate of her life, but she could rely on God’s word to change her viewpoints on things and learn to rationally treat things that happened to her. Now, Xiao Yun has been abroad and is still performing her duty as a created being under the leading of God. Xiao Yun feels in the bottom of her heart that without God’s salvation, she would not be what she is now. She has made a resolution that she will perform her duty faithfully to repay the great love of God!

 

Dear brothers and sisters, if you have any understanding or enlightenment from God,
welcome to share with us via:
1. The online chat window at the bottom of the website
2. Send an email to [email protected].
We sincerely hope we’ll grow spiritually through sharing with each other.

Welcome to Share!
The Covenant of Rainbow

The Covenant of Rainbow - Build your spiritual life from Knowing Jesus Christ, Bible Study, Christian Life, Christian Testimonies and more. May we get new enlightenment on our path of faith everyday!

https://www.rainbowtoken.com/

Also Read:

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

3 × three =